In her book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, Psychotherapist Amy Morin emphasizes the importance of honest communication. This involves taking responsibility for your emotions and allowing others to do the same. Diluting the truth, especially in difficult conversations, can prevent the clarity needed to resolve issues.
Here are some strategies to communicate more directly and openly while still maintaining kindness.
Why Do We Feel the Need to Be Overly Polite, and What Are the Downsides?
Fear of Conflict:
However, this avoidance frequently leads to misinterpretations, causing the true intention or urgency of the message to be lost. When messages are wrapped in layers of politeness, confusion and misunderstandings can arise, complicating relationships.
This can result in unresolved issues, lingering resentment, and ultimately a breakdown of trust in those relationships.
Desire to Please:
When feedback lacks clarity, recipients may not recognize the need for change or improvement, leading to unresolved problems that can escalate over time.
This desire to please can compromise authenticity, resulting in superficial relationships that are based on false pretenses rather than genuine connection. The repercussions of this can create a barrier to deeper, more meaningful interactions.
Cultural Norms:
Over time, the lack of clarity can make one party feel unheard or misunderstood, ultimately damaging trust and connection in relationships.
6 Strategies for Clear Communication
1. Prepare Your Key Points:
Preparing your key points helps establish a clear foundation for the conversation, which is crucial for building trust and ensuring that both parties understand each other’s intentions.
2. Be Clear and Concise:
Clarity prevents misunderstandings and promotes transparency, allowing both partners to feel heard and respected, which is essential for a healthy relationship.
3. Provide Constructive Feedback:
Constructive feedback fosters growth and improvement in a relationship, enabling partners to work together to resolve issues and strengthen their bond.
4. Practice Empathy:
Practicing empathy demonstrates respect and validation for your partner’s feelings, fostering emotional intimacy and encouraging open dialogue.
5. Set the Right Tone:
A consistent tone reinforces your sincerity and respect, which are vital for maintaining trust and emotional safety in a relationship.
6. Encourage Openness:
Encouraging openness fosters a sense of safety and belonging, making both partners feel valued and supported. This approach strengthens the relationship by nurturing deeper connections and reducing the likelihood of unresolved issues.
You are not alone.
If you or someone you love is in need of support, please contact the Battered Women’s Support Services Crisis Line:
Call toll-free: 1-855-687-1868 Metro Vancouver: 604-687-1867 Email: EndingViolence@bwss.org