The trauma of intimate partner violence (IPV) leaves deep emotional and psychological wounds that can last long after the abuse has ended. Survivors are often left to navigate the complexities of mental health impacts like anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress, all while living in a society that frequently downplays or ignores their experiences. Research shows that nearly 60% of women who have experienced IPV report mental health issues, with many facing long-term effects like chronic anxiety and depression.
Self-care is a crucial part of the healing process. It can help restore a sense of control and well-being. Prioritizing mental health and recognizing the need for healing is a powerful and necessary step in reclaiming one’s life after abuse.
On this World Mental Health Day, we must confront the ways intimate partner violence affects survivors’ mental health and recognize the courage and strength it takes to heal. Survivors deserve more than survival post-abuse—they deserve pathways to recovery, empowerment, and the opportunity to take back their power and reclaim their well-being.
1 – BOUNDARIES
Problem: Difficulty Setting Boundaries
Survivors of IPV often struggle to establish and maintain healthy boundaries due to the emotional manipulation, coercion, and control they experienced. The abusive partner may have normalized boundary violations, leaving survivors feeling unsure of their right to say “no” or to protect their personal space.
Self-Care Tip: Set Healthy Boundaries
Start by gradually establishing boundaries with yourself and others. This can be as simple as saying “no” when you need to or taking time for yourself without guilt. Set clear limits around who you allow in your life and how you allow them to treat you. Boundaries are a powerful tool for reclaiming your autonomy. The act of defining your limits is an essential step in taking back power in your life.
2 – SUPPORT SYSTEMS
Problem: Isolation and Lack of Support
IPV often leads to survivors feeling isolated or cut off from supportive relationships, either because the abusive partner intentionally alienated them from others or because survivors have internalized feelings of shame and unworthiness. Many survivors report that isolation worsens their mental health symptoms.
Self-Care Tip: Surround Yourself with Supportive People
Seek out relationships that are affirming and supportive. Whether it’s a close friend, family member, or survivor community, find people who validate your experiences and encourage your healing. Survivors who have strong social support are 65% more likely to recover from anxiety and depression. BWSS also offers support groups, where you can connect with others who have faced similar experiences, share your story, and receive guidance on healing. Connection with others can remind you that you are not alone in your healing journey.
3 – MINDFULNESS
Problem: Hypervigilance and Anxiety
IPV often leads to survivors feeling isolated or cut off from supportive relationships, either because the abusive partner intentionally alienated them from others or because survivors have internalized feelings of shame and unworthiness. Many survivors report that isolation worsens their mental health symptoms.
Self-Care Tip: Practice Mindfulness and Grounding Techniques
Engage in mindfulness exercises that help you focus on the present moment and calm your nervous system. Practices like deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and guided meditations can help reduce anxiety and hypervigilance. Grounding techniques—such as feeling the texture of an object or focusing on your breath—can help bring you back to the present and reduce panic or intrusive thoughts. A study found that mindfulness reduced symptoms in 60-70% of trauma survivors.
4 – PHYSICAL ACTIVITY
Problem: Emotional and Physical Tension
IPV survivors often experience both emotional and physical tension that can manifest as headaches, fatigue, muscle pain, or sleep disruptions. Trauma can take a toll on the body, creating a sense of heaviness or discomfort in day-to-day life.
Self-Care Tip: Engage in Physical Activity
Exercise is a powerful tool for releasing both physical and emotional tension. Whether it’s a gentle walk in nature, yoga, or even dancing in your living room, moving your body helps to release pent-up stress and activates the release of feel-good hormones like endorphins. For survivors of intimate partner violence, physical activity can reduce symptoms of depression by up to 30%, offering a tangible way to begin healing. The key is to find movements that feel nurturing and empowering for your body, and always remember that even small steps forward are significant.
5 – THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS
Problem: Suppressed Emotions and Overwhelming Thoughts
After experiencing IPV, many survivors struggle to process or express their emotions, especially when they have been manipulated or gaslit. Survivors may feel overwhelmed by sadness, anger, shame, or confusion and may find it difficult to talk about their experience.
Self-Care Tip: Journal Your Thoughts and Emotions
Writing allows you to express feelings that may be difficult to say out loud. It can be an intimate, private way to process your trauma and track your emotional healing. Journaling helps survivors make sense of their feelings, release pent-up emotions, and even set intentions for recovery. Studies show that expressive writing reduces PTSD and anxiety symptoms in trauma survivors by allowing them to externalize their emotions.
6 – SELF-TALK
Problem: Negative Self-Talk and Low Self-Worth
IPV often leads survivors to internalize harmful beliefs about themselves, such as feelings of unworthiness, guilt, or shame. These negative self-perceptions are exacerbated by the abusive partner’s manipulation, and survivors may struggle to rebuild their sense of identity.
Self-Care Tip: Practice Compassionate Self-Talk
Challenge the harmful thoughts that may have been planted during the abusive relationship. Remind yourself daily that the abuse was not your fault. Engage in positive self-talk by using affirmations, such as “I am worthy of love and respect,” or “I am strong and capable of healing.” Healing requires patience and self-compassion. A study found that survivors who practiced self-compassion experienced lower levels of PTSD and depression.
7 – CREATIVE OUTLETS
Problem: Difficulty Expressing Emotions
Many survivors of IPV may have been silenced or silenced themselves due to shame or fear of retaliation. As a result, expressing emotions can feel like an insurmountable task. This suppression can further isolate survivors and lead to mental health struggles such as depression and anger.
Self-Care Tip: Engage in Creative Outlets
Creative activities like art, music, or writing can serve as emotional outlets for survivors who find it difficult to express their feelings. Studies show that art therapy can reduce symptoms of PTSD and anxiety by 50% in trauma survivors. These outlets allow survivors to explore their emotions in a non-verbal way and re-establish their sense of self. Creative expression can help reconnect survivors with their inner strengths and rediscover joy.
As an organization dedicated to ending violence in all its forms, BWSS stands in solidarity with victims and survivors. For resources on safety, accessing support, and taking action against gender-based violence, visit our website.
You are not alone.
If you or someone you love is in need of support, please contact the Battered Women Support Services Crisis Line:
Call toll-free: 1-855-687-1868
Metro Vancouver: 604-687-1867
Email: EndingViolence@bwss.org