Jan 24, 2012 | Battered Women's Support Services
Legal Advocacy Workshops
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Battered Women’s Support Services
Battered Women’s Support Services, Legal Services and Advocacy Program announces 2012 Legal Advocacy Workshops to support women dealing with violence/abuse and legal issues with a specific emphasis on Family Law
Workshops will be held Wednesday from 12 noon to 2 pm
Location: Battered Women’s Support Services in Vancouver (for confidentiality purposes please call us to obtain the address)
In Attendance: The BWSS Legal Advocate, Annie Zhang, a volunteer lawyer (may be male) and women who need support with their current legal cases.
Format of Workshop: These workshops are designed for women who are ineligible for legal aid and/or in need of legal support for their cases. Lawyers and other professionals with experience on the topic will facilitate all workshops. Women may bring forms or relevant paperwork to the workshop for their own self-reference.
What is provided?
Legal information, strategies for specific legal issues/topics
Resources
Coffee/tea
For registration and information call the Intake Line at 604-687-1867
Jan 17, 2012 | Battered Women's Support Services
The Journey of One
By Anon
How did I end up at Battered Women’s Support Services? This is my journey…
My parents are immigrants. My Mom is from Trinidad and my Dad is from Germany. They immigrated to Canada in the 1960’s. They met, got married, and had three girls of which I am the youngest. They had no family here to help support them, just themselves.
When I was approximately 3 years old my parents left me with an acquaintance for 3-4 days without my siblings. My Mom had to have surgery and my Dad was working; so my Mom asked the next-door neighbours if they could look after us. They agreed, but they had 2 children of their own. My parents worried that they were causing too much of a burden for the neighbour, so when the pastor’s daughter, an acquaintance, offered to take the “the baby”, they agreed. They thought it would be easier for everybody.
One day our family went to the pastor’s daughter’s house; we had never been there before. I don’t know how long we stayed, but what happened there would have a devastating impact on me. I remember being in the lady’s arms with my back to the window when I noticed the room had gotten quiet. I looked around to see what happened. My family was gone. Fear and shock hit me and this primal sound came out of me. Panicked, I frantically tried to get out of the lady’s arms. As I struggled, I saw my family. They were outside walking towards the car. Desperately I screamed and tried to get their attention, “Mom, Dad wait!” “Mom, Dad, wait!! … I’m here …you forgot about me! …you forgot about me!!!” It did not matter what I did; they did not see or hear me. It was like I was invisible. Then they left.
I get emotional when I think about my abandonment experience, even though it was not intentional and it happened 37 years ago. It was a traumatic experience, and traumatic experiences have cellular memory.
My mother picked me up 3-4 days later. I remember when she came; I acted like I did not see her. I was so wounded words could not explain. I remember feeling anger towards her. You left me. You hurt me. The carpet had been whipped out from under my feet. I feared any moment it could happen again. My safety and security was breached. My defences would remain on high, and subconsciously I vowed that I would never let anybody hurt me like that again. The environment in which I was raised was difficult. My mother was a strong loving woman, but she worried a lot. She also imposed some of her beliefs and experiences on us. My mother is a dark-skinned Black woman who experienced racism. In her attempt to alert us to some of life’s harsh realities she would say: “Because you are Black, you have to work twice as hard to succeed”, or “You can’t trust nobody.” Her intentions were good, but her words only scared me. She alerted us more to the potential dangers in the world than our abilities. I was convinced that the world was not safe, life was not fair, and that I was disadvantaged because of my colour.
My Dad was different. He was a dictator. He was highly critical and he ruled with anger. He bought into the myth that ‘children should be seen and not heard’. It always seemed that whenever my sisters and I were having fun, he would storm in and ask us what we were doing. It was like our laughter bothered him. We were not allowed to be “kids”. Feeling good about yourself also seemed to be sinful because he was quick to put you in your place. He was not above intimidating or humiliating you. He never apologized for his actions even when he was wrong. He was the authority. My sisters and I feared him. When we would talk to our mother about our Dad she would say: "Your Dad was born during the war… that is his culture… it is just because he is working so hard… but your Dad is a good father because he provides." It is true. My Dad was born and raised in Germany in 1939, and he did provide. We lived in a nice house and there was always food on the table.
When I was 15 years old I was in a bad car accident. I was sitting in the back of a station wagon not wearing a seat belt. My sister’s boyfriend was driving when we were hit. The car spun around, the back door opened, and I was ejected. I landed on my head and my back. I fractured my skull, sustained a brain injury, permanently lost my sense of smell, fractured my 7th vertebrae, punctured my ear drum, and had numerous cuts, bruises, lacerations etc. To this day I have no memory of the accident and very little memory of the nine days I spent in the hospital. The only day I remember more clearly is the day I left the hospital. That is when I realized that this was not just a bad dream, this really happened. I got angry. I had difficulty grasping this reality. I had a brain injury and it was believed that my ability to learn would decrease. That devastated me. Why did this happen to me, not that I wished this on anybody else, but why me? I was a good girl. People would say I was “too” nice. I cared so much about other people. I would be friends with everybody, even the outcasts. I never wanted to see people rejected by others or bullied because in a way they were part of me. I always wanted harmony I never challenged authority. I was obedient and polite. Why me? My mother would take me to the doctor frequently because of my moods and my preference to have died in the car accident. I was not suicidal really it is just that I think death would have been easier. Doctors would explain that depression is very common in people who have suffered brain injuries; the other symptoms were just written off as normal teenage angst. I was referred to some psychiatrists, but no one really seemed to get me. I floundered. A few times I did attend a brain injury support group, but I was often higher functioning than the others in the group and that was depressing. One lady tried to hit me with her crutch one time. She became agitated as I shared some of the difficulties that I was having at work. She yelled at me, “At least you can work.” That experience upset me.
I was too high functioning to access disability, and yet I was affected by my injury. I was easily overwhelmed, had trouble concentrating, had problems with my short term memory, it often took me longer to do things. I was damaged goods. How could I compete with others? Who would want me?
I remember when I met my husband. I wanted someone who was the opposite of my father and I thought I met my match. Things were great for the first several years then things started to change, especially after our son was born. The differences in our culture, our perception and expectation of our parental roles and duties and the differences in our religious beliefs increasingly became a problem. When we met we believed love would conquer all. Now he was imposing his beliefs on me. He would criticize my interests and my beliefs. He became more opinionated and less compromising. We would argue a lot. There was a lot of tension and anger. At times he got so angry he would start to shake and sweat. He looked like a man about to lose his sanity. He would threaten to commit suicide. One day he did pick up a knife and challenged me. I sought counselling from my pastor who suggested we see a marital counsellor with at least 20 years experience and to continue to pray. I did pray a lot, but nothing changed. We saw a marital counsellor and it became very clear to me that my husband and I saw things differently. My h
usband came from another country. He has no family here except me, our son, and my family. My family witnessed some of his actions and attitude and became increasingly less supportive and more suspicious of him. I would tell my husband what I need to make our relationship work, but he never listened. I was staying in the marriage because of my religious beliefs. Because my husband did not commit adultery or physically abandon me, divorce was not permissible. I was miserable.
One night, the potential volatility of our relationship hit me and I felt the need to warn my family. My husband’s uncontrollable rage, his threats, he did not want our relationship to end, but I did and I let him know that. What would happen to me if I leave and take our son? Despite my fear of the possible consequences, I took our son and fled to a shelter that provides temporary housing for women fleeing abusive relationships. That was a year ago.
Presently I am in Second Stage housing and my son goes to daycare. I started taking the Empowering Women Employment Program for Immigrant Women in May 2011. This course has changed my life. I have never felt better about myself and my abilities. The facilitators and the counsellors are excellent. They respect and honour you and your process. They teach you about the importance of recognizing your needs, and taking care of yourself. There are courses like R.U.O.I.A. which stands for: Recognize, Understand, and Overcome the Impacts of Abuse. This course is mandatory in the program. They teach you about understanding your emotions, like anger. Anger is not wrong. It is a normal human emotion and a natural adaptive response to threats. How you express anger is what makes the difference. There are classes in effective communication, relationship building, working with others and numerous employment related programs. There is also a course called Awareness + Action = Empowerment. I love the programs and have benefitted greatly from them. The Empowering Women’s Employment Program for Immigrant Women has had an incredible impact on me.
Soon I will get training to do volunteer work and I want to go back to school. I am planning to go to college. I am passionate about sharing knowledge to empower others. I want to communicate to promote awareness and help bring about positive social change. The majority of our society is unaware of how common and how deep the problem of violence against women is. Abuse is not just physical, or sexual. Abuse is often verbal, emotional, psychological, financial, cultural etc. and equally destructive. I have learned so much at BWSS. I have been empowered. Now I want to take what I have learned and share it with others.
Jan 10, 2012 | Battered Women's Support Services
Mark Benton, Q.C.
Executive Director,
Legal Services Society
400 – 510 Burrard Street
Vancouver, BC V6C 3A8
January 6, 2012
Open Letter Re: LSS Publication “Men Abused by their Partners”
Dear Mr. Benton:
We write concerning LSS’s April 2011 publication entitled “Men Abused by their Partners,” a fact sheet for heterosexual men who have allegedly experienced mistreatment or abuse by their female partners. We say ‘allegedly’ because it is very common for abusive men to blame their spouses for the troubles they are experiencing in a deteriorating relationship. As service providers we must be very aware of this reality and work to assess these situations and not be fooled by initial accusations that may be unfounded. At the core of our concerns is the potential for misinformation to empower abusers and give them fodder to continue an abusive cycle.
We look forward to a continuing dialogue about this and other LSS publications concerning issues of domestic violence and abuse. We trust that the comments contained in this letter will be helpful to the LSS in its important work of disseminating useful, relevant, and accurate legal materials.
Until recently, the “Men Abused by their Partners” fact sheet contained a number of extremely problematic statements that appeared contrary to law and liable to misapplication. Of particular concern were:
- The definition of “sexual abuse” to include a woman criticizing a man’s sexual performance or withholding sex as a type of punishment
- The suggestion that a man who is feeling “embarrassed” by his partner is experiencing abuse
- The targeting of the publication to men in heterosexual relationships only, which ignores the reality of violence against gay men in same-sex relationships. Research suggests that men in same-sex intimate relationships are much more likely to experience violence than men in heterosexual relationships. 1
After discussions between LSS and several of the undersigned organizations, on December 8, 2011, LSS updated the fact sheet by amending the definition of sexual abuse, removing the reference to feeling “embarrassed,” and making other minor changes. Thus, some of the most troubling aspects of the document have been removed, namely, a definition of sexual abuse that reinforces a male entitlement to sex and incorrectly implies that women are not free to refuse sex in any circumstance and for any reason, a view that is contrary to law2 and which deeply trivializes the experiences of survivors of sexual abuse. LSS also advised that a separate publication for gay men is forthcoming. Despite the amendments LSS has made, the document, especially within an otherwise gender- and sexual orientation-neutral framework, remains problematic. The issue of men’s social and economic power in relation to women is rendered invisible, as is an analysis of who is most often the primary aggressor in an abusive relationship. There also remains the question of how this publication, including the problematic and legally unsupportable definition of sexual abuse, was able to make its way into circulation in the first place. The concerns raised by this publication are particularly important given LSS’s role in administering public legal aid. The Director of Public Legal Education and Applications must ensure that intake personnel are able to effectively adjudicate cases and ensure that limited legal aid resources are targeted to those most in need. In the case of family law, LSS has determined that those most in need of legal aid are victims of abuse. Therefore, it is essential that all of LSS’s legal information, publications and training materials convey an accurate understanding and analysis of the gender and power dynamics at play in abusive family situations. The apparent lack of oversight of the legal information being disseminated on this important and complex topic greatly affects our confidence in LSS on this front, and causes us to worry that legal aid applications made by women alleging abuse are being denied without a full and fair consideration of these issues.
In light of the limited legal aid budget in this province and the epidemic nature of lethal violence against women, we are concerned that in producing this publication, LSS’s scarce resources have been allocated to a very small minority of heterosexual men. We would expect that in the midst of a legal aid crisis, resources would be allocated to marginalized groups, such as women facing violence and low-income British Columbians (who also tend to be women). If LSS is committed to making a resource specifically for men who are victims, a pamphlet for boys abused by their fathers and step-fathers or a pamphlet for men in same-sex relationships would serve a more statistically significant population. In addition to our concerns about the specific content of the “Men Abused by their Partners” fact sheet referred to above, we are concerned about the decision to eliminate the use of gender specific terminology in LSS’s 2011 Live Safe fact sheet series, with the exception of this one publication for men abused by women. The decision not to name women (except as offenders) in this series represents a significant shift from LSS’s previous approach, reflected in its 2004 fact sheet series Legal Information for Battered Women. It is also inconsistent with the recommendations contained in the “Report on a Community Review of LSS publications on Violence against Women in Relationships,” which was shared with many of our organizations after concerns about the “Men Abused by Their Partners” fact sheet were brought forward.
This 40-page Community Review document explicitly states that LSS should continue to use gender-specific terms in its publications on relationship violence, and should include an explanation that the information also applies to anyone experiencing violence in a relationship. As the advocates involved in the consultation point out, to do otherwise would distort the social reality of violence in relationships, as it is overwhelmingly women who are abused in relationships, and men who inflict the abuse. Men’s experience of abuse by their female partners, while unacceptable, very rarely includes violence, does not occur with the same frequency or intensity and is simply not an equivalent experience; gender neutral language serves to mask these critical differences and could put lives in danger.
A legal opinion commissioned by LSS related to the use of gender-neutral language reinforces this view; the opinion notes that strict gender neutrality does not necessarily result in substantive equality, and if one group is previously disadvantaged, strict neutrality may perpetuate that situation. The report is silent on the implications of naming a disadvantaged group as perpetrators of violence, with no reference to this group as victims.
The Community Review also mentions several audiences who would benefit from specific fact sheets, including the LGBT community, older women, youth, people with low literacy, and people with disabilities, as well as heterosexual men. While the review was cited by LSS as the reason the “Men Abused by their Partners” publication was prioritized, the decision to start with a publication specifically for heterosexual men is simply not justified based on the Community Review document we received. We are also concerned about the way in which the term “consultation” has been used
to justify this publication. In an initial conversation about this document with three women’s organizations, the Director of Public Legal Information and Applications stated that the need for this document came out of a public consultation and that women’s organizations were part of that consultation. Two women’s organizations were identified by name. When informed that they had been mentioned, these two agencies asked for clarification because they did not recall taking part in the consultation and had not identified the need for a publication for men abused by their female partners. The Director responded to these concerns in an e-mail to the Jane Doe Advocates network on December 7, 2011. In that email she stated that the 2009 community consultation reviewing LSS’s publications on violence against women “identified a need for a resource for men who are abused. When asked who participated in the consultation, Atira and BWSS were the only agencies I recalled by name. No attribution beyond participating in the consultation was intended.”
Organizations that were named maintain that no meaningful consultation with their organization took place. As a result, we feel that there has been a misuse of the concept of consultation and a tokenizing of women’s organizations’ involvement in setting priorities.
The decision to prioritize a publication for men abused by their female partners is also not supported by statistics and research on intimate partner violence. In the fact sheet, LSS states that “studies done in Canada show that about six percent of men have been abused by their female partners.” While it is unclear where these statistics were taken from, the Statistics Canada 2009 General Social Survey reports that 6% of the Canadians surveyed had experienced physical or sexual victimization by their partner in the last 5 years, and that a similar proportion of males and females reported having experienced spousal violence.3 However, these statistics do not specify the gender of the perpetrator of the violence. If LSS is basing its claim that six percent of men have been abused by their female partners on these statistics, this is inaccurate and misrepresentative of the data. Furthermore, many other data sources suggest that these numbers significantly underestimate the prevalence of violence against women.4
Moreover, statistics like these fail to capture the growing phenomenon of women falsely accused of abuse by men, nor the significant number of women abused by men who do not report their abuse because of economic dependence on their abuser or fear of retaliation and harm. The data do not distinguish between offensive and defensive acts, or tell us whether they were a single incident or part of a pattern of violence. Women are more than twice as likely as men to be injured as a consequence of abuse, five times more likely to require medical attention or be hospitalized, and four times more likely to be killed by their male partners. Abuse against women by men is much more likely to be severe and repeated, and women are at a much higher risk of being injured or killed upon leaving a violent relationship. With the prevalence of abuse against women by male partners, it is estimated that the social cost of this form of violence is $4.2 billion in Canada. 5
Men’s Rights Activists use the language of equivalency to undermine women’s anti-violence work and delegitimize women as the primary victims of abuse, claiming that domestic violence is a gender-neutral phenomenon and that men’s experiences of “husband battering” are being suppressed. They rely on a selective reading of research statistics, ignore serious methodological flaws in the studies, dismiss mountains of conflicting evidence, and cause significant harm to the very men they claim to be trying to assist.6 It is essential that an important organization like LSS maintain a balanced, nuanced and accurate understanding of spousal violence.
Yours truly,
Atira Women’s Resource Society
Battered Women’s Support Services
Ending Violence Association of BC
Pivot Legal Society
South Fraser Women’s Services
West Coast LEAF
YWCA Munroe House
cc:
Sherry MacLennan
LSS Director, Public Legal Information and Applications
Hon. Shirley Bond
Attorney General of BC, Minister of Public Safety and Solicitor General
David Loukidelis
Deputy Attorney General of BC
1 Jessica L. Stanley et al., “Intimate violence in male same-sex relationships” (2006) Journal of Family Violence.
2 See R. v. J.A., 2011 SCC 28.
3 Statistics Canada, Family Violence in Canada: A Statistical Profile (January 2011), online: <
http://www.statcan.gc.ca/pub/85-224-x/85-224-x2010000-eng.pdf>.
4 See for example Canadian Research Institute for the Advancement of Women, “Violence against Women and Girls” online: <http://criaw-icref.ca/>.
5 L. Greaves, O. Hankivsky, J. Kingston-Riechters, Selected Estimates of the Costs of Violence Against Women. (London, Ontario: Centre for Research on Violence against Women and Children, 1995).
6 For a very helpful summary of the problems with these claims, see Michael Flood, “Claims about ‘husband battering’” (Melbourne Australia: Domestic Violence and Incest Resource Centre, 1999
Dec 22, 2011 | Battered Women's Support Services
Fighting Sexual Assault, One Tweet at a Time
In 2011, activists harnessed the Internet to make visible everyday violence that too often goes unreported.
BY Sady Doyle
From In These Times – With Liberty and Justice for All
One of the gifts of the Internet is that it can make local or fringe stories into big, international ones.
When a history of 21st-century feminist activism is someday written, 2011 may be labeled Year Rape Broke. Sexual assault and harassment have, of course, always been key feminist concerns. But in 2011, sexual violence, exploitation, or intimidation were part of nearly every major story that fell under the heading of “women’s issues”–and the activism against it has been particularly widespread, focused and effective.
As we enter this renaissance of sexual assault awareness, it’s worth considering the ways in which new media has informed it–and, indeed, perhaps even made it possible.
The major sexual-assault headlines of the year are easy to name. The pushback to HR3, the “No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion” act, was spurred by its redefinition of rape to include only “forcible” assaults. Journalist Lara Logan was sexually assaulted while covering the Egyptian revolution. The Dominique Strauss-Kahn rape allegations dominated the headlines for most of the summer. The once front-running Republican Presidential candidate, Herman Cain, dropped out of the race after his personal history surfaced; that history included several harassment complaints and one allegation of sexual assault.
But where there has been ugliness, there has also been substantial and effective pushback. The “Rape is Rape” campaign, started by Ms. Magazine, got the FBI to change an unreasonably narrow definition of rape that had not been touched since 1929. And the biggest feminist protest movement in years, SlutWalk–which has sparked copious press coverage everywhere from Feministing to The New York Times, and which has staged marches around the globe–was sparked by a Toronto police officer’s off-hand comment that women who didn’t want to get raped (which, one would think, is all of them) should avoid “dressing like sluts.”
Rape has become central to the feminist discourse again in 2011, much as the question of whether we could have a female president became central again in 2008. While there are several compelling arguments as for how this happened–for one, this was simply a year in which an unusually large number of high-powered men were accused of sexual misconduct or violence–one of them often goes unnoticed and uncredited. That is to say, feminists may simply be more aware of misogyny and sexual violence because it is more easily visible online.
Much of the especially virulent misogyny online is produced by self-anointed “men’s rights activists,” or MRAs. Writer David Futrelle started his blog Manboobz in September 2010 to monitor and mock them.
“At the time, I actually didn’t realize just how misogynistic these guys were,” Futrelle told me in an e-mail. “I found myself reading blog posts on how women didn’t deserve the right to vote, how the solution to domestic violence is for men to hit women harder than women hit them, how men built civilization while women sat on their lazy asses. It was, not to get too hokey about it, a sort of voyage of discovery for me.”
It’s also a voyage of discovery for his readers, who are able to actually see the different forms that virulent misogyny can take–from claiming that Lara Logan lied about her assault to giving tips on how to pay homeless women for sex. Futrelle’s dissection of these unappetizing blog posts is a public service: It’s hard to claim that we live in a post-sexist society when visible examples of blatant sexism are being pointed out on a daily basis.
This is one of the gifts of the Internet: It can make local or fringe stories into big, international ones. Whereas someone looking to educate herself about rape in 1991 would have to rely on books, and whatever made the local or national papers, someone looking for the same information in 2011 can simply enter “rape” into Google news, and see fresh rape statistics the unfolding rape case of a University of Oklahoma professor, and several discussions of the rape scenes in “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo,” among many other stories.
Feminists who hope to raise awareness of sexual violence, in turn, can pull from these stories when educating themselves or making their arguments. On my own Twitter and Facebook feeds, I can see several stories that look small but which actually serve to demonstrate both the pervasiveness of sexual violence, and the existence of resistance to it: The college blog network Campus Basement posts an article “jokingly” giving a list of instructions for date rape, and it is taken down almost immediately due to feminist pushback. After the hashtag #itaintrapeif trends worldwide it’s covered by Jezebel, the counter-hashtag #RapeIsNotAJoke i
s formed, and it’s drowned out in protest by the end of the day. The existence of misogyny online can, indeed, pose an actual threat to female or feminist bloggers, as I have noted. But, if recent history has anything to say about it, feminists online are forming a variety of very effective strategies to counter it when necessary.
Activists can also harness the Internet to make visible the sorts of everyday violence that all too often go unreported. Emily May’s Hollaback! is an organization aimed at ending street harassment, which allows women to upload phone camera shots or accounts of street harassment to specific city-based websites, thereby creating a highly visible record of how common and extreme it can be.
“Social media is best at storytelling, and storytelling is what catalyzes social change,” May told me. “Now we don’t have to wait for the media to pay attention to our stories, we can tell our stories to over 1,000 people within minutes… I think social media is going to allow our generation to take on day to day discrimination in a big way by shifting our experiences from isolating to sharable.”
It’s not only the experiences of oppression or sexual violence that have become sharable: It’s the precise shape of the attitude that allows and creates those experiences, as in the case of #itaintrapeif, which was nothing if not a public archive of pro-sexual assault sentiments. Despite the undeniable headache induced by having to see the stuff in one’s Twitter feed, this may be a strange blessing. This generation is fighting against sexual assault harder than ever–and that is at least in part because they have more information than ever about what it is they have to fight.
ABOUT THIS AUTHOR
Sady Doyle is an In These Times Staff Writer. She’s also an award-winning social media activist and the founder of the anti-sexist blog Tiger Beatdown (tigerbeatdown.com).
Nov 28, 2011 | Battered Women's Support Services
What is Sexual Harassment
Source: http://www.un.org/womenwatch/osagi/pdf/whatissh.pdf
What?
Unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favours, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature when:
- Submission to such conduct is made either explicitly or implicitly a term or condition of a woman’s employment, or
- Submission to or rejection of such conduct by an individual is used as a basis for employment decisions affecting such woman or
- Such conduct has the purpose or effect of unreasonably interfering with an woman’s work performance or creating an intimidating, hostile, or offensive working environment.
Unwelcome behaviour is the critical word. Unwelcome does not mean "involuntary." A woman may consent or agree to certain conduct and actively participate in it even though it is offensive and objectionable. Therefore, sexual conduct is unwelcome whenever the person subjected to it considers it unwelcome. Whether the person in fact welcomed a request for a date, sex-oriented comment, or joke depends on all the circumstances.
Sexual harassment includes many things…
· Actual or attempted rape or sexual assault.
· Unwanted pressure for sexual favours.
· Unwanted deliberate touching, leaning over, cornering, or pinching.
· Unwanted sexual looks or gestures.
· Unwanted letters, telephone calls, or materials of a sexual nature.
· Unwanted pressure for dates.
· Unwanted sexual teasing, jokes, remarks, or questions.
· Referring to an adult as a girl, hunk, doll, babe, or honey.
· Whistling at someone.
· Cat calls.
· Sexual comments.
· Turning work discussions to sexual topics.
· Sexual innuendos or stories.
· Asking about sexual fantasies, preferences, or history.
· Personal questions about social or sexual life.
· Sexual comments about a person’s clothing, anatomy, or looks.
· Kissing sounds, howling, and smacking lips.
· Telling lies or spreading rumours about a person’s personal sex life.
· Neck massage.
· Touching an employee’s clothing, hair, or body.
· Giving personal gifts.
· Hanging around a person.
· Hugging, kissing, patting, or stroking.
· Touching or rubbing oneself sexually around another person.
· Standing close or brushing up against a person.
· Looking a person up and down (elevator eyes).
· Staring at someone.
· Sexually suggestive signals.
· Facial expressions, winking, throwing kisses, or licking lips.
· Making sexual gestures with hands or through body movements.
Examples of Sexual Harassment
VERBAL
· Referring to an adult as a girl, doll, babe, or honey
· Whistling at someone, cat calls
· Making sexual comments about a woman’s body
· Making sexual comments or innuendos
· Turning work discussions to sexual topics
· Telling sexual jokes or stories
· Asking about sexual fantasies, preferences, or history
· Asking personal questions about social or sexual life
· Making kissing sounds, howling, and smacking lips
· Making sexual comments about a woman’s clothing, anatomy, or looks
· Repeatedly asking out a woman who is not interested
· Telling lies or spreading rumours about a woman’s personal sex life
NON-VERBAL
· Looking a woman up and down (Elevator eyes)
· Staring at woman
· Blocking a woman’s path
· Following the woman
· Giving personal gifts
· Displaying sexually suggestive visuals
· Making sexual gestures with hands or through body movements
· Making facial expressions such as winking, throwing kisses, or licking lips
PHYSICAL
· Giving a massage around the neck or shoulders
· Touching the woman’s clothing, hair, or body
· Hugging, kissing, patting, or stroking
· Touching or rubbing oneself sexually around a woman
· Standing close or brushing up against a woman
Impact of Sexual Harassment
The impact of sexual harassment varies from person to person and is dependent on the duration and severity of the harassing behaviour. The impact of sexual harassment on the person being harassed is often much greater than one may think. It can impact a person physically, emotionally, economically and socially and affect one’s career and academic performance or potential.
Some of the potential effects are:
- Anxiety, frustration, depression, sleeplessness and/or nightmares, difficulty concentrating, headaches, fatigue, shame and or guilt, feeling powerless, helpless or out of control, feeling angry towards the harasser, loss of confidence and self-esteem, withdrawal and isolation, suicidal thoughts or attempts
- Retaliation from the harasser, or colleagues/friends of the harasser, should the woman complain or file a grievance (retaliation can involve revenge along with more sexual harassment, and can involve stalking the complainant)
- Having to drop courses, or change academic plans; it may impact grade performance
- Increased absenteeism to avoid harassment, or because of illness from the stress
- Having one’s personal life held up for public scrutiny – the victim becomes the “accused,” and their dress, lifestyle, and private life will often come under attack. (Note: this rarely occurs for the perpetrator.)
- Being objectified and humiliated by scrutiny and gossip
- Becoming publicly sexualized
- Defamation of character and reputation
- Stress impacting relationships with significant others, sometimes resulting in the demise of the relationship; equally, stress on peer relationships and relationships with colleagues
- Impact on references/recommendations
- Loss of career – threatened or actual
- Feeling unsafe to leave one’s home and/or enter work/school where the harassment took place
- Physically and emotionally withdraw from friends, family, and coworkers
- Difficulty interacting with others
- Alcohol or drug use/misuse
- Change in appetite
- Stomach aliments
- Threatened or actual loss of income/benefits/promotions/opportunities
1-855-687-1868
Intake and Crisis Line
Emotional support, information, referral, legal advocacy
Nov 24, 2011 | Battered Women's Support Services
16 Days of Activism Against Violence Against Girls and Women
November 25 to December 10, 2011
The 16 days of Activism Against Gender Violence was created out of the Global Campaign for Women’s Human Rights in June 1991. The campaign highlights the connections between women, violence, and human rights from November 25th to December 10th. This time period includes other significant dates such as November 25th, the International Day Against Violence Against Women; December 1st, World AIDS Day; December 6th, the anniversary of the Montreal Massacre – The National Day of Remembrance & Action Against Violence Against Women; December 10th, Human Rights Day.
The 16 Days of Activism is observed and honoured internationally by a variety of organized events, demonstrations, talks, performances, and public education forums. More than 800 organizations in over 90 countries participate in the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Violence.
The goals of the 16 Days of Activism are to not only create a movement that is solid and strong to raise awareness around violence against women, but to also call for better protection, responses, and ultimately the elimination of violence against women.
Battered Women’s Support Services (BWSS) works each and every day to end violence against girls and women. For the 16 Days, BWSS will be sending out and sharing how our ending violence workers take action on the elimination of violence against girls and women.
So follow us on Facebook, Twitter and our Ending Violence Blog. Please share what you or your community is doing to honour and participate in the 16 Days of Activism against Violence against Women.
Here are some links to what some local folks are doing for the 16 Days:
Women Against Violence Against Women – http://www.wavaw.ca/
Vancouver Rape Relief & Women’s Shelter – http://www.rapereliefshelter.bc.ca/
Simon Fraser University – http://www.sfu.ca/pamr/media-releases/2011/sfu-researchers-celebrate-anti-violence-campaign.html
Vancouver Status of Women – Presents: Performing Real Life: Personal stories of Low income Single Mothers in Vancouver A Psychodrama Workshop with Gabriela Reynoso, Saturday, Dec. 3rd, Kiwassa Neighbourhood House – http://www.vsw.ca/
City of Vancouver – http://cfapp.vancouver.ca/communitypages_wa/index.cfm
Some International Activities:
United Nations Women Watch – http://www.un.org/womenwatch/calendar/
For more information about the origins of the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Violence, you can go to http://www.un.org/womenwatch/daw/news/vawd.html.
