Being in a healthy relationship means…
- Taking care of yourself before and while in a relationship
- Respecting individuality, embracing differences and allowing each person to “be themselves”
- Doing things with friends and family and having activities independent of each other
- Discussing things, allowing for differences of opinion, and compromising equally
- Expressing and listening to each others feelings, needs, and desires
- Trusting and being honest with yourself and each other.
- Respecting each others need for privacy
- Sharing sexual histories and sexual health status with partner
- Negotiating birth control
- Practicing safer sex methods
- Respecting sexual boundaries and being able to say no to sex
- Resolving conflicts in a rational peaceful and mutually agreed upon way
- There is room for positive growth and you learn more about each other as you develop and mature
If you are in an unhealthy relationship…
- You care for and focus on another person only and neglect yourself or you focus only on yourself and neglect the other person
- You feel pressure to change to meet the other person’s standards, you are afraid to disagree, and your ideas are criticized. Or you pressure the other person to meet your standards and criticize her ideas.
- One of you has to justify what you do, where you go and who you see
- One of you makes all the decisions and controls everything without listening to the others input
- One of you feels unheard and is unable to communicate what you want.
- You lie to each other and find yourself making excuses for the other person
- You don’t have personal space and have to share everything with the other person
- Your partner keeps his sexual history a secret or hides a sexually transmitted infection from you or you do not disclose your history to your partner.
- You feel scared of asking your partner to use protection or he has refused your requests for safer sex or birth control. Or you refuse to use safer sex/birth control methods after your partner has requested or you make your partner feel scared
- Your partner has forced you to have sex or you have had sex when you don’t really want to you. Or, you have forced or coerced your partner to have sex.
- One of you yells and hits, shoves, or throws things at the other in an argument.
- You feel stifled, trapped and stagnant. You are unable to escape the pressures of the relationship
Every woman has the right to be safe and free from violence. BWSS provides a secure environment in which women are free to express themselves without being judged or threatened. Call our Crisis and Intake Line at 604.687.1867 or Toll Free: 1.855.687.1868