A few ways to deal with coverage of the Jian Ghomeshi trial

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As Jian Ghomeshi’s trial began Monday, February 1, 2016, the first of two sexual assault trials taking place in Toronto, we are beginning to see a rash of articles and think pieces about Ghomeshi’s career, about how the trial could be for the complainants, about sexual violence in Canada and rape culture, and about woman leading his defence team. The first complainant has courageously shared her testimony about the brutal violence she experienced by Ghomeshi. Her testimony is being shared in numerous articles and live blogs that are disclosing what is transpiring in the court room today.

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These are the messages women and girls are told by society/media about how to avoid sexual violence. (image 1 of 3)

When it comes to sexual assault, the Canadian legal system doesn’t have a very good track record. The conviction rate for sexual assault is one of the very lowest of all the crimes in Canada. There are a lot of women out there who aren’t believed. There are a lot of disincentives to report.

Recent stats indicate that women’s reports of sexual violence to police or legal systems have plummeted in large part due to women giving up on the legal system’s ability to provide a measure of justice in sexual assault cases.

Let’s face it, the media isn’t much  better, doesn’t always do a good job reporting on violence against women in general and sexual violence specifically. A conference held recently in Toronto explored media reporting  this video explores how media perpetuates victim blaming troupes and this resource was written for journalists urging them to Use the Right Words when reporting on sexual violence

What to do as we are about to be inundated with media and social media reports of this trial?

“During the first go-around of the Ghomeshi media machine.  I felt unprepared. Like many others, I am bracing myself for what is sure at times to be a teeth-gritting, enraging, disappointing, frustrating, and heartbreaking process of awaiting updates, listening to analyses, and anticipating the trolls that are certain to emerge any time such a public case is discussed.” Lucia Lorenzi writes in rabble.ca

Here are a few options for self care and to deal with triggers:

  • Assess and make decisions about how much media you want to take in.
  • Set limits with people around you, friends, family, co-workers about talking about the trial.
  • Make decisions to stay from social media generally or specifically the comments section on news sites on social media sites.
  • Don’t assume everyone wants to discuss the trial. Give thought to what articles you share or if you share articles at all about the trial.
  • If you’re experiencing strong responses to media and/or social media reports you may be having a flashback or otherwise being triggered.
  • Remember, you can mute the #Ghomeshi tag if you need to. Take care of yourself.

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What is a flashback?
A flashback is when memories of a past trauma feel as if they are taking place in the current moment. That means it’s possible to feel like the experience of sexual violence is happening all over again. During a flashback it can be difficult to connect with reality. It may even feel like the perpetrator is physically present.

Flashbacks may seem random at first. They can be triggered by fairly ordinary experiences connected with the senses, like the smell of someone’s odor or a particular tone of voice. It’s a normal response to this kind of trauma, and there are steps you can take to help manage the stress of a flashback.

What helps during a flashback?
If you realize that you are in the middle of a flashback, consider the following tips:

  • Tell yourself that you are having a flashback. Remind yourself that the actual event is over and that you survived.
  • Breathe.
  • Take slow, deep breaths by placing your hand on your stomach and taking deep breaths. You should see your hand move out with the inhalations, and watch it fall in with the exhalations.
  • When we panic, our body begins to take short, shallow breaths, and the decrease in oxygen can make you feel more panicked. Deep breathing is important because it increases the oxygen in your system and helps you move out of anxious state faster.
  • Return to the present by using the five senses.
    • Sight: Look around you. Make a list of the items in the room; count the colors or pieces of furniture around you. What do you see?
    • Smell: Breathe in a comforting scent, or focus on the smells around you. What do you smell?
    • Hearing: Listen to the noises around you, or turn on music. What do you hear?
    • Taste: Eat or drink something you enjoy. Focus on the flavor. What do you taste?
    • Touch: Hold something cold, like a piece of ice, or hot, like a mug of tea. What does it feel like?
  • Recognize what would make you feel safer.

Wrap yourself in a blanket, or go into a room by yourself and close the door. Do whatever it takes for you to feel secure.

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How to prevent flashbacks?
You may be able to take steps to prevent future flashbacks by identifying warning signs and triggers:

  • Be aware of the warning signs.
    Flashbacks sometimes feel as though they come out of nowhere, but there are often early physical or emotional warning signs. These signs could include a change in mood, feeling pressure in your chest, or suddenly sweating. Becoming aware of the early signs of flashbacks may help you manage or prevent them.
  • Identify what experiences trigger your flashbacks.
    Flashbacks can be triggered by a sensory feeling, an emotional memory, a reminder of the event, or even an unrelated stressful experience. Identify the experiences that trigger your flashbacks. If possible, make a plan on how to avoid these triggers or how to cope if you encounter the trigger.

Where to get help?
There is a relief that comes with the end of a flashback, but that doesn’t mean it’s a one-time occurrence. Flashbacks can worsen over time if you don’t address them.

Here is a list of resources where help is available:

In British Columbia

https://www.bwss.org/resources/resources-for-women-in-bc/

In Canada

https://www.bwss.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/TransitionHousesinCanada11.pdf

Lucia Lorenzi says it best:
“It is impossible tell what the outcome of the Ghomeshi trials might be. It is harder still to predict if and how these trials will achieve what so many promised they would: to create a “watershed” moment regarding sexual violence in Canada. I don’t know if Ghomeshi will be convicted. Knowing the absolute brokenness of the Canadian justice system when it comes to sexual assault cases, I am deeply skeptical of such an outcome. I don’t know if our conversations about sexual violence will change: but, if they do, it will certainly take more than the trials of one former Canadian media darling. Sexual violence is not unusual or exceptional. It is happening every day in Canada. Most perpetrators will never see a day in court. Most victims will never receive justice. I don’t know how to fix a broken system.

What I do know is that as Ghomeshi’s trials take place, we do need ways to approach these difficult conversations: to be mindful of ourselves, of others, and to make sure that talking about violence doesn’t become another form of violence in and of itself.”

Report on Services for Those Who Wish To Exit the Sex Industry

Local Sex Worker Serving Consortium Launch Report on Services for Those Who Wish To Exit the Sex Industry

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Press Release

For Immediate Release

May 4, 2015

Local Sex Worker Serving Consortium Launch Report on Services for Those Who Wish To Exit the Sex Industry

Vancouver, BC – In an effort to respond to the existing gaps and effectively meet the needs of those who do sex work, five community organizations with a vast range of expertise in delivering services to individuals engaged in the sex industry have formed a Consortium to oversee the design, development and implementation of a transition, retiring and exiting program. The report they launch today is the first step in the development and implementation of transitioning programs and other related services for sex workers that would be undertaken by the consortium organizations.

Aboriginal Front Door, Battered Women’s Support Services, HUSTLE at HIM – Health Infinitive for Men, PACE Society, and the WISH Drop-In Centre Society each have a variety of expertise in working with different groups and individuals engaged in the sex industry, including self-identified female and male sex workers, survival/street sex workers Indigenous women, Migrant and Immigrant indoor workers, and victims of violence.

“This report lays a foundation from which to work to initiate programming for individuals seeking transitioning from sex work.” said Kate Gibson, Executive Director, WISH Drop-in Centre Society “We are working together to effect structural change and personal change for people involved in sex work.”

“We work to support people by meeting them where they are at. When people have expressed that they are ready for change, we support them in their change journey. Some people don’t like what they’re doing, but they do it because they’re addicted. Some people do it to get money to feed their family, but mostly it’s addictions; there are many factors, including but not limited to: Residential school abuse by authority figures, childhood sexual abuse, poverty, and cultural disconnect.” said Thelma Jack, Interim Executive Director, Aboriginal Front Door “We work holistically to support people with their healing and cultural reconnection.”

Since the closing of PEERS Vancouver in May 2012, there has been a significant gap in services to support the diverse needs of individuals engaged in sex work. Sex work exiting programming was one of the recommendations in Forsaken: The Report of the Missing Women Commission of Inquiry (MWCI).

“Sex Work is work, but we can’t ignore how one’s position of privilege and power disproportionately shapes their experience in sex work, and we definitely cannot provide effective support without the active participation of Sex Workers”. said Laura Dilley, Executive Director, PACE Society.

The Consortium has worked within the City of Vancouver’s Task Force on Sex Work and Sexual Exploitation which was formed in September 2011 with the mandate to prevent sexual exploitation and protecting vulnerable adults and neighbourhoods affected by sex work.

“As a program of the Health Initiative for Men Society, HUSTLE continues to develop and expand to meet the growing needs of self-identified men in sex work, many of whom are now online, and as a member of the consortium we have a unique opportunity to work collaboratively and address the needs of sex workers in our community and restore a critical option for individuals wishing to make significant change in their lives.” said Matthew Taylor, Outreach Program Manager at HIM.

“We recognize there are layers and complexities to how people move into, within and out of the sex economies and throughout those experiences and decision making processes, through this initiative, we seek to build on existing supports to extend to options for transitioning, exiting and retiring.” said Angela Marie MacDougall, Executive Director, Battered Women’s Support Services.

Read the full report here

For more information:

Laura Dilley, Executive Director PACE Society –  604-880-5913

Kate Gibson, Executive Director, WISH Drop-in Society – 604-669-9474

Angela Marie MacDougall, Executive Director, Battered Women’s Support Services – 604-808-0507

 

 

You could do something to End Violence Against Women

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Youth Safety Plan

YOUTH SAFETY PLAN

Safety is always at the centre of our work at Battered Women’s Support Services. You may call BWSS Crisis & Intake Line at 604-687-1867 or toll free at 1-855-687-1868 for support and information.

If you are in an abusive relationship, remember that reading or researching online may also present risks, you can log off the page quickly by clicking the EXIT button on the of the page.

The following steps represent my plan for increasing my safety and preparing in advance for the possibility for further violence. Although I do not have control over my partner’s violence, I do have a choice about how to respond and how to best get myself to safety.

Name:

Date:

To increase my safety, I can do (some or any of) the following:

1. When I have to talk to my abusive partner in person, I can:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2. When I talk to my abusive partner on the phone, I can:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

4. When I feel a fight coming on, I will try to move to a place that is lowest risk for getting hurt, such as: (at school) (at home) (in public).

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

5. If I have ended the relationship, I can tell the following people and ask them to call the police if they see my abusive partner bothering me.

Teacher: _________________________________

Friend:   _________________________________

Relative: __________________________________

I will decide for myself if and when I will tell others that I have been abused, or that I am still at risk. Friends, family, co-workers, and school personnel can help protect me, if they know what is happening, and how they can help.

1. I can tell my teacher, co-workers, boss, or a friend about my situation. I feel safe telling:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2. I can ask _______________ or ______________ to help screen my phone calls at home or work.

4. When walking, riding or driving home, if problems occur, I can:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

5. If I use the school bus or public transportation, I can:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

7. I can also:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

For Myself

1. If I feel down, I can talk to sources of support, like friends, neighbours, a teacher, or crisis line. The people and numbers I can call include:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2. I can attend a support group for youth that have been abused. Support groups are held:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

3. Other things I can do to make myself feel better:

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Safety During An Argument 

1. If we have an argument on a date and I feel unsafe, I will (Who could you call to get a safe ride home?) (What would you do if left in an isolated area?):

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2. If we have an argument at school and I feel unsafe, I will (Who could help you?) (Where could you be safe at school?) (What teacher/counsellor/friends do you trust?): ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Safety in My Home

1. I will _____________________________ if he comes over and I’m alone and feeling unsafe.

(Who can you call to come over?) (Who can you call if you need help?)

2. I will _____________________________ if we get in an argument and I feel unsafe. (What exits are there in your house?)

(Where are all the phones that you can use to call the police?)

3. When he calls and I feel threatened I will:

(Can you screen your calls with an answering machine?)

(Change your phone number?)

4. If I don feel safe at home, I can go to __________________ house or ______________.

(Friends/family members houses you feel safe at and could stay over night if necessary)

You can download Personalized Safety Plan  here.

 If you could do something to end violence against girls and women, wouldn’t you?

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Online and Cell Phone Safety Planning for Youth

Online and Cell Phone Safety Planning

Safety is always at the center of our work at Battered Women’s Support Services. You may call BWSS Crisis & Intake Line at 604-687-1867 or toll free at 1-855-687-1868 for support and information.

If you are in an abusive relationship, remember that reading or researching online may also present risks, you can log off the page quickly by clicking the EXIT button on the of the page.

Name:

Date:

The following steps are my plan for increasing my safety online and on my phone.

To increase my safety, I can do (some or any of) the following

  1. I will set all my online profiles to be as private as they can be.
  2. I will save and keep track of any abusive, threatening or harassing comments or posts.
  3. I will never give my password to anyone.
  4. I will change my usernames, email addresses, passwords and/or cell phone number if the harassment does not stop.
  5. I will delete/block any followers who harass me
  6. I will only accept friend requests/followers from people I know
  7. I will not share my phone number or home address on my profile
  8. I will report fake profiles
  9. I will only post things that I am comfortable with the public seeing
  10. If someone posts a private photo of me online without my permission I will: report it to the police, tell a teacher/counselor, tell a parent/ guardian, call a crisis line, report online, other: ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
  11. I will not answer calls or text messages from unknown, or blocked numbers.
  12. I will see if my phone company can block my abusive partners’ phone number from calling my phone.
  13. When he calls and I feel threatened I will: (Screen your calls with voice mail?)(Change your phone number?) _________________________________________________________
  14. I will save any information that suggests a violent threat
  15. If I choose to contact the police I will do my best to provide specific details such as any tangible evidence collected.
  16. Telephone Numbers I Need to Know:

RCMP/ Local Police Department: _______________________________

Counselor: _______________________________

Victim Service Worker: _______________________________

Battered Women’s Programs: _______________________________

Crisis Line: _______________________________

Work Number: _______________________________

Lawyer: _______________________________

Other: _______________________________

You can download Personalized Safety Plan here.

  If you could do something to end violence against girls and women, wouldn’t you?

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Resources for Women in British Columbia

For 35 years, Battered Women’s Support Services has worked to end violence against women through providing direct services, delivering training and education workshops, engaging in social enterprise and advocating for institutional, systemic and social change.  We join with our allies and colleagues providing direct service support to women, children and families all across the province.

If you or someone you know is experiencing violence or abuse, there are support services and transition houses throughout British Columbia and in other regions in Canada.  See this link for general information about violence in relationships or sexual assault, understanding risk and planning for safety as well as how to get legal information or call our intake and crisis line at 1-877-687-1868 toll free or 604-687-1867 in Metro Vancouver.

If you could do something to end violence against girls and women, wouldn’t you?

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Your Rights On Reserve: A Legal Tool-kit for Aboriginal Women in BC

Last week, Atira Women’s Resource Society released a legal tool-kit for Aboriginal Women in British Columbia. Led by Atira Women’s Resource Society’s legal advocate Amber Prince, this tool-kit was created by Aboriginal women, for Aboriginal women.

Says Ms. Prince, “As Aboriginal women with varying experience with the law we have seen in our work and in our lives how gaps in legal information creates hardships for Aboriginal women in BC.”

The tool-kit aims to address some of the identified gaps in legal information for Aboriginal women.

“We hope this tool-kit will be of assistance to women, their families and their communities,” says Prince, “as well as for service providers helping Aboriginal women understand some of their legal rights in BC and especially as they apply on reserve.”

The tool-kit includes chapters on taxation, employment issues on Reserve, social assistance / welfare, education, Indian Status, Band membership, Reserve land and housing issues, wills and estates Issues, family law, relationship violence, Ministry of Children and Families Development and governance issues.

The Tool kit is available for download here.

This blog was originally posted on Atira Women’s Resource Society. For full article, please visit here.